Parental alienation is a painful and complicated issue that can arise after divorce. When your co-parent begins to manipulate your child’s perception of you—through subtle comments, false stories, or discouraging contact—it can create a deep emotional divide that’s hard to fix. This blog explains what parental alienation is, why it matters, and what legal options exist for parents in Utah who want to protect their relationship with their child.
Key Takeaways:
- Parental alienation occurs when one parent intentionally tries to damage the relationship between the child and the other parent.
- This behavior can cause serious emotional harm to children and may influence custody decisions in court.
- Utah courts take parental alienation seriously and may allow for legal remedies, including custody modifications or court orders to protect the parent-child bond.
What Is Parental Alienation?
Parental alienation happens when one parent actively undermines or manipulates a child’s relationship with the other parent, usually during or after a contentious divorce or custody battle. This can take many forms, including:
- Constantly badmouthing the other parent in front of the child
- Telling the child lies or exaggerations about the other parent’s behavior
- Making the child feel guilty for spending time with the other parent
- Creating an atmosphere of fear, anxiety, or disapproval when the child mentions the other parent
- Interfering with scheduled parenting time or sabotaging visits
While not every criticism or disagreement rises to the level of alienation, patterns of behavior that create distance, distrust, or hostility between the child and the targeted parent may be considered parental alienation.
How Does It Start?
In many cases, the alienating parent may not even see themselves as doing harm. They may believe they are “protecting” the child or “telling the truth.” But intent is not always the point—it’s the impact that matters.
The alienating parent may still be grieving the end of the relationship or may have unresolved anger toward their ex. Unfortunately, children can become pawns in these emotional dynamics, especially when one parent can’t (or won’t) separate their feelings about the breakup from the child’s right to a meaningful relationship with both parents.
What Are the Signs?
If your child suddenly becomes cold, fearful, or distant with you—and there’s no obvious reason—you may be witnessing the early signs of alienation. Other red flags include:
- Your child is repeating negative language or “scripted” stories about you
- Refusing to attend visits or claiming they don’t want a relationship with you
- Excessive loyalty to the other parent, even when that parent’s behavior is questionable
- A sudden shift in affection or behavior following a visit with the other parent
These can be heartbreaking changes for any parent to witness, especially when you know your relationship was once loving and secure.
How Does Parental Alienation Affect Children?
Children caught in the middle of alienation often suffer emotionally and psychologically. Studies show that kids exposed to long-term alienation can experience:
- Low self-esteem and trust issues
- Difficulty forming healthy relationships later in life
- Anxiety, depression, and identity confusion
- Guilt and emotional conflict from being forced to “choose” one parent over another
In short, parental alienation can be a form of emotional abuse—not just toward the targeted parent, but toward the child as well.
Children need to be free to love both parents, even when those parents don’t love each other anymore. When that emotional freedom is taken away, it can create lasting damage.
What Can Be Done About It?
If you suspect your co-parent is turning your child against you, the first step is to document everything. Courts rely on facts and patterns of behavior, so try to keep a clear record of:
- Missed or interrupted parenting time
- Disturbing text messages, emails, or voicemails
- Notes about what your child is saying or how they’re behaving
- Any witnesses (teachers, therapists, relatives) who may have observed changes
Once you have a record of what’s happening, you can speak with a family law attorney about your options.
Legal Options for Addressing Parental Alienation in Utah
Utah family courts take the child’s best interests seriously, including maintaining strong relationships with both parents when safe and appropriate. If parental alienation is proven, the court may take corrective steps, including:
1. Custody Modification
If the alienating parent is interfering with the court-ordered parenting plan, you may be able to petition the court for a custody change. In some cases, courts may grant sole physical or legal custody to the targeted parent if it’s determined that ongoing alienation is harming the child.
2. Court-Ordered Counseling or Reunification Therapy
Judges may require counseling or therapy for the child and parents to help rebuild damaged relationships. Reunification therapy can be especially helpful when a child has been deeply influenced by the alienating parent.
3. Contempt of Court
If your ex is violating a custody order by denying or manipulating parenting time, they may be held in contempt of court. This can result in fines, sanctions, or even temporary loss of custody or visitation rights.
4. Guardian ad Litem (GAL) or Custody Evaluation
The court may appoint a neutral third party—like a guardian ad litem or a custody evaluator—to investigate what’s happening and make recommendations about what arrangement would be healthiest for the child moving forward.
What If You’re Not Sure It’s Alienation?
It’s not always easy to see if the problem is parental alienation or your child’s way of coping with a major life change.
This is where working with a skilled family law attorney can be incredibly helpful. A good lawyer will listen to your story, ask the right questions, and help determine whether the behavior you’re seeing meets the legal standard for parental alienation—or if other supportive strategies may be more appropriate.
You’re Not Alone—And You Don’t Have to Let It Continue
If you’re feeling heartbroken, frustrated, or helpless watching your child slip away because of your ex’s influence, please know this: there are steps you can take. Parental alienation is not just emotionally devastating—it can also have real legal consequences. You have the right to protect your relationship with your child, and Utah law supports that right.
At Green Legal Group, we help Utah parents navigate some of the most painful and complex family law issues, including parental alienation. Whether you need to modify your custody order, gather evidence, or understand your legal options, our team is here to support you every step of the way—with empathy, clarity, and a deep commitment to your child’s well-being. Don’t wait until more damage is done—Contact Green Legal Group today to schedule your free consultation and take the first step toward protecting your relationship with your child.